Meditation, Mental Health, and Mindfulness

Now, more than ever, it’s important to remember that there is no health without mental health.
During these difficult times, we encourage you to take care of yourselves and check in on loved ones.
You are not alone, and we will get through this together. 

— Daniel H. Gillison, Jr., National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI)

May is Meditation Month as well as Mental Health Awareness Month. Research shows it only takes 10 minutes of meditation a day to see significant positive benefits to your life. Simple 1 minute meditations are an easy way to get started. 

Free guided meditation exercises are offered by UCLA and Head in the Clouds, an excellent way to try different techniques and find one that suits you. No need for any special equipment or training or membership fees to get started. Simply set aside a few minutes to explore the links referenced here, and/or find a quiet area around your home to be alone with your thoughts.

For some people, being still may seem like torture. Fortunately physical activity can be a satisfying way to find inner peace. Active mindfulness can be practiced through exercise, a sport, a hobby or craft project, or an activity like gardening. Meditation and mindfulness can be practiced anywhere. 

  

According to the World Health Organization, 1 in 4 people will be impacted by a mental or neurological illness at some point in their lives. In the US, 1 in 5 people experience some form of mental illness each year, with 1 in 25 adults experiencing a serious mental illness. These stats mean someone in your life is likely coping with anxiety, depression, OCD, bipolar disorder, borderline personality disorder, or another debilitating condition right now. The stigma of mental illness can make it hard to seek help or know what to say to those who struggle. 

The CDC and Good Housekeeping maintain mental health websites linking a variety of resources to help people dealing with mental illness, as well as family and friends wanting to support loved ones.

Additional information and resources are linked below:

• 8 apps support mental health mindfulness.
• 13 stress relieving activities you can do from home.
• Author Bert Anderson recommends multiple mental health resources and tools.
• Deepak Chopra explained how mindfulness can help people survive crisis.
• Heart Math free online program help people manage stress and anxiety.
• How to succeed in meditation without really trying: Let it be.
• It’s ok to block, delete, unfollow, or unfriend someone for your own mental health.
• Military technique helps people fall asleep in 2 minutes.
• Monkey mind: how to identify it and ignore it.
• Reminding people with borderline personality disorder you love them is helpful.
• Resources tool kit for mentally healthy schools.
• Unicef recommends strategies to help teenagers protect their mental health.
• United Nations shared tips for well being during the pandemic.
• Well being coach Jason Williams shared tips for meditating at home.

Mental health related news articles:

• Coronavirus anxiety is having a huge impact on young people
• Doctors are experiencing serious mental health ramifications during pandemic.
• Elon Musk seemed to buckle under pressure of stay at home order.
• Health care workers seek to flatten curve of their rising mental anguish.
• Lorenzo Lewis helps men of color talk about mental health through their barbers.
• Return to resiliency: societal actions to mitigate the behavioral health impact of the pandemic.
• Some people with anxiety and depression experience paradoxical improvement during crisis. 
• Study found Joker film made some people more prejudiced against those with mental health issues.
• Tennessee quarterback Brian Maurer shared details of his anxiety, depression, and thoughts of suicide.
• Train engineer intentionally crashed locomotive near USNS Mercy hospital ship in attempt to expose perceived conspiracy.
• WI man accused of stabbing family feared coronavirus would kill them.

In the spirit of sharing softer news and/or silly vibes:

• Baking can be beneficial for mental health.
• Jim Gaffigan: kids, quarantine and sanity not compatible.
• Mo Rocca explored the 1973 toilet paper panic exacerbated by Johnny Carson.

Daily pandemic update:  

UK Prime Minister Boris Johnson announced a cautious easing of the country's lockdown, encouraging those who cannot work from home to go back to their workplaces and allowing people to go out for unlimited exercise. Saudi Arabia will impose tough austerity measures by tripling its Value Added Tax from 5% to 15 %, in addition to halting monthly payments to citizens in order to cope with record low oil prices and a coronavirus-led economic slump.  Aljazeera.com timeline

11 May 2020	Cases		Deaths		Recovered
13:58 GMT*	Yesterday	Today	Yesterday	Today	Yesterday	Today
World	4,146,036	4,215,483	281,957	284,680	1,463,003	1,506,240
US	1,352,313	1,369,157	80,323	80,807	238,848	256,345
NY	343,409	345,406	26,771	26,812	56,566	58,100
CT	32,984	33,554	2,932	2,967	65	65
NC	14,891	14,945	561	565	1,808	1,808

*Documenting time of day because real time data updates continuously.
Tracking specific states:  NY is US epicenter. Son Reid lives in CT. I live in NC. 
Worldometers          Coronainusa          Starsexpress2020

A moment of silence for those we’ve lost to coronavirus, including the first 100 in the US.

In the news: 

• CBS 60 Minutes exposed pandemic government hypocrisy and disinformation.
• Dallas TX secret shoppers revealed only 4% of businesses were ready to reopen.
• More than 14,000 people volunteered to be infected with coronavirus in human challenge trials.
• Nurses are quitting due to PPE shortages.
• Soon after Trump tweeted OBAMAGATE!, then #TrumpGate and #TrumpJealousofObama trended. 

Following Kenny Beck’s lead to share a few signs of hope:

• Dolly Parton made million dollar donation to support Vanderbilt University research for COVID-19 antibody testing and treatment.
• Kroger is donating 200,000 gallons of surplus milk to food banks.
• Multiple people donated stimulus checks to help others, not themselves.
• Night Watch superhero handing out face masks to homeless in Winston Salem, NC.
• Reginald Rooster and sidekick perk up CA neighborhood.

In my personal life…

Here’s a simple meditation I use: Forget about all the shoulds you tell yourself, or others may tell you. Instead, focus on your wants, things you actually enjoy and/or want more of in your life. This could be more quality time with a family member, better mental or physical health, a specific goal you may have, or maybe something simple and straightforward like more toilet paper. Think about what it would feel like if you had it, whatever “IT” is for you, and imagine how much of “IT” would be enough to satisfy you. Don’t edit your thoughts or judge yourself. Let your mind wander wherever it might go. No need to set a timer or write in a journal, unless you want to. Simply breathe in through your nose, hold it for a second or longer, exhale through your mouth and/or nose, and repeat. As your mind takes a little vacation, continue to breathe slowly and deeply. I sometimes do this while gardening, or relaxing in my backyard hammock which occasionally leads to a peaceful nap. When I nod off, I typically wake up calm and refreshed, with a clearer sense of intention and purpose than before.

Twice in my life I have been treated for depression. The first time was in college and the second time was shortly before I made the decision to retire early. My parents were not at all supportive when I told them about taking anti-depressants and talking to a therapist when I was 19 years old. They were embarrassed and uncomfortable, and they didn’t want anyone else in our family to know. Thankfully Greg’s reaction was completely different when I needed help at age 49. A year later and I’m feeling much better, despite the pandemic.

My mom was frequently depressed during my childhood. As a kid I thought she was lazy because she slept more than she did anything else. My brother and I compensated by doing more chores around the house: cooking, cleaning, and laundry. It was years later before I learned about depression through my own personal experience.

Later in life my mom displayed odd behaviors that defied explanation or understanding. After her divorce from my dad she moved in with her parents on the family farm. She isolated herself in an upstairs bedroom and started using a bucket to relieve herself rather than walk downstairs to the only bathroom. She hung blankets over the windows to keep the room dark, left clothes piled in heaps on the floor, collected newspapers in tall stacks after reading them, and left her ashtray overflowing with cigarette butts. She begrudgingly allowed me to clean her room during a weekend visit, which was emotionally and physically exhausting. But she would not see a doctor, neither a medical doctor nor a mental health professional.

She tried living on her own but that didn’t work out well. She lived with my brother and his family for a while too. After her parents died she moved back into the farm house for a time, lived with other relatives intermittently, then eventually settled into a rent controlled apartment in a community for older adults. At one point she was diagnosed with COPD and subsequently started oxygen treatments to help her breathing. Still, we could always smell cigarette smoke in her apartment when we visited.

The last year of her life was the strangest. She experienced intense mood swings, paranoia, and forgetfulness. My brother and I went with her to see her general practitioner and a neurologist, neither of whom offered much help or insight. Next I took her to the county mental health services office. Someone met with her for 30 minutes, less time than it took to fill out the required paperwork, and recommended group therapy. Two weeks later she entered a manic phase. She called me constantly, drove her car erratically, threatened to shoot a maintenance / repair man, and went so far as to purchase a gun from a local pawn shop. She was on the verge of being evicted when she died unexpectedly, alone -- on Reid’s 19th birthday. No one knew until the following day when my sister in law called the police for a wellness check after mom didn’t answer the phone or come to the door.

The death certificate stated COPD was the cause of death but that didn’t make sense. Her physical health was significantly better than her mental health at the time. My brother and I considered requesting an autopsy to find out but didn’t. She was dead. The madness was over. The why didn’t matter much in that moment. Randy and I arranged for cremation while we cleaned out her apartment. A week later we scattered her ashes near the fish ponds on the farm.

I felt a range of emotions as I made my way through the stages of grief, but tears did not flow easily. The first good cry I had came when I heard Ozzy Osborne’s Crazy Train on the car radio. She wasn’t an Ozzy fan so I guess it was the lyrics, specifically the word crazy that set me off. For more than a year I burst into uncontrollable sobs whenever I heard that song. Even now I feel sad when I hear it because it reminds me of her.

Other people in my life, family and friends, are currently dealing with depression, anxiety and other forms of mental stress. I check in on them but try not to pester them too much because I remember being annoyed with people who constantly bothered me when I was working through my own depression. One friend is manic depressive, more manic lately, and I cannot deal with her right now. It’s easier for me to connect with someone who is depressed, to listen to them talk about their situation, than to follow the ramblings of someone in full fledged mania. Erratic energy reminds me of my mom during her final months. I didn’t deal with her effectively then and I still don’t know how. Maybe someday I will learn but right now I choose to protect my personal boundaries, to put myself first. I offer support as I am able. However, it is not my responsibility to fix anyone else.