Monday Oct 26: Hold My Beer

 
Monday October 26 I woke up tired and depressed. Didn’t want to go to work. Wished I could have closed my eyes and slept for days. Washed my face and brushed my teeth but skipped breakfast so I wouldn’t be late. Drove to work in silence, no music on the radio, so I could think without distractions. If I quit then Lois would probably quit too, which might result in our voting site being closed, which would inconvenience voters and potentially suppress votes. If I didn’t quit then I would have to endure 7 more days of workers not showing up for their scheduled shifts and low information voters not understanding how districts and precincts and wards result in different down ballot options.
 
The facility director’s car wasn’t in the parking lot so I prepared myself to search for security staff to unlock the voting room. I was pleasantly surprised to notice a different security guard standing near the front door. We greeted each other warmly, introduced ourselves, and thanked each other for being there. That was the best moment of the entire day.
 
Only 2 other women showed up to work, Brenda and Tammy. Tina called out sick due to a migraine. Miss Woods was a no show after calling out sick Sunday. Jennifer said she would be late but didn’t come in at all. Mia arrived late around 9:30am (closer to 9:45am) so I handled curbside until she arrived. On a busy day, 6 to 8 workers per shift was ideal though we learned to manage with less. 3 workers was a record low, a new challenge.
 
The first curbside voter was a white man with COPD which reminded me of my mom who died 5 years ago. As I scanned his ballot I noticed he voted for Trump. Dammit.
 
A woman absentmindedly placed her blank ballot in the scanner despite instructions from Brenda and a sign on the machine alerting voters to mark and review their ballots carefully before scanning. We canceled her first vote and gave her a provisional second chance. 
 
Another woman completed her ballot with check marks instead of filling in ovals then chastised us for not telling her to fill in the ovals despite Brenda having told her to fill in the ovals. The woman also overlooked the sample drawing of a filled in oval on her ballot and did not see the sign with instructions posted next to her. We spoiled her first ballot and gave her a second chance. 
 
Then an older white man dressed exceptionally well came in to cast his vote for Trump. Dammit again.
 
While Mia assisted a curbside voter behind the building, I assisted 3 curbside voters parked in front because they hadn't seen the signs directing them where to park. They all voted for Biden - yay! Meanwhile Kamala Harris’ husband, Doug Emhoff, was in town and happened to stop by the voting site while I was outside so I caught a glimpse of him from a distance.
 
Back in the voting room a white family came in with their toddler and they voted for Trump. Bless their hearts. 
 
Later an older man wearing bib overalls came in to vote. He reminded me of my grandfather, a farmer and a staunch Harry Truman democrat. I held my breath looking down at his ballot as he slid it into the DS200 tabulator. YES - he voted for Biden! For a few moments my faith in white voters was temporarily restored.
 
A black couple came in to vote next. Brenda assisted the wife while I helped the husband. He had not voted in a long time so his name had been dropped from the roll of registered voters. I advised him he could re-register on site and asked for ID to verify his address. He said he didn’t have any ID with his current address on it; not a driver’s license or a bill or anything else, absolutely nothing. I advised him he could vote a provisional ballot that would be placed in an envelope and reviewed by the Board of Elections since he didn’t have ID. He didn’t like that. He wanted to vote the same as his wife. I apologized to him and again explained his options. He reluctantly agreed to cast a provisional vote. I gave him a ballot and asked him to return it to me when he finished. His wife walked over to assist him and when he was done, she instinctively placed his provisional ballot in the ballot scanner like she had done with her own ballot. I dropped my head and let out a sigh of disbelief. I reminded them the provisional ballot was supposed to be placed in a special envelope, not scanned. They reacted defensively and left unhappy. 
 
A voter suppression watchdog working outside heard them talking about their less than smooth experience so she came inside to investigate. I explained what happened and she criticized me for not handling the situation better. I bit my lip to keep from crying, apologized and tried to explain. She looked down at me with contempt, criticized me further, then turned and walked back outside. Several women gathered around me in support. I told Lois I was ready to go home and not come back. She said she would quit if I did, and she asked me to reconsider. Brenda passed me a post-it note of encouragement, asking me to stay for her. A young black female voter who had witnessed the exchange told me not to feel bad, and not to quit. I paused to think about the 3,500+ voters we had helped and the hundreds more I hoped would vote by the end of the week. I wanted to go home because I felt tired and hopeless but I decided not to quit for them, and for Brenda and Lois and the other workers. I told them I needed to go home and get some rest and I assured them I would return tomorrow. I promised. 
 
After linner with Greg I took a long nap. Someone from the BOE called around 8pm; I didn’t answer and they didn’t leave a message. Lois texted around 8:30pm, still working on the closing checklist. We were both tired and frustrated but we promised each other we would finish together. Each remaining day I told myself this is the last Monday (Tuesday, Wednesday, etc.) I will ever have to work early voting ever again. Ever. EVER. I wish I could have done it with grace and class but apparently I couldn’t. I lowered my expectations from wanting to do a great job to just wanting to make it through Saturday. Then I could sleep Sunday. Then I could meet the team at the Tobaccoville Community Center to set up Monday evening for election day Tuesday. 
 
I worried election day would likely be worse than every early voting day combined. It was sure to be an excruciatingly long day (6am until at least 8pm, likely longer). The majority of voters in that precinct were registered republicans and that weighed heavy on me. Also, the chief judge had never worked an election so the assistant judges (me and another lead I had not met yet) would have to work extra hard to help him. The best thing about my early voting assignment was that 99% of the voters were black. When a white person walked in, odds were 50/50 how they would vote. However, black voters consistently voted for democrats roughly 98% of the time. Didn’t see a single person write in Kanye West for president, not one. A Biden victory would be because of black voters, black women specifically, some white women, and other non-white voting blocs. I was hopeful Biden would win but not confident. Didn’t want to jinx him.
 
I apologized to my women friends for being so whiny and for sharing so much negativity in my email updates. I didn’t want pity or polite atta-girl comments, though I craved positive energy. I asked them to please keep thinking positive thoughts, lighting candles, saying prayers; all the things they had been doing. I told them I would try to stop being an emotional vampire when voting ended.